How a Screensaver changed my life.

I didn’t know it at the time, but one of the most profound adventures of my life began with three words scribbled on a piece of paper.

More than ten years ago, after seeing a photo on a screensaver, I wrote down: Maasai Mara, Kenya.

I recently found that note again while cleaning out old university storage bins. Looking at it now, I can’t help but laugh.  Because the girl who wrote those words had no idea that one day she wouldn’t just visit Kenya…she would move there.

At the time, there was nothing particularly spiritual about it.

I wasn’t praying about Kenya.  I wasn’t asking God where He wanted me to live.  I certainly wasn’t dreaming about becoming a missionary.  I simply saw a beautiful place on a screensaver and thought, “One day I want to see that zebra in that place,” so I wrote the name down before I forgot it. That piece of paper eventually ended up tucked away while I moved on with life.

What I didn’t know was that God had already begun writing a story I couldn’t yet read.

The years that followed looked nothing like I expected.  Life took me for quite the ride.  I eventually moved overseas, lived in three different countries, and somehow found myself building a life in Sweden.  It was there that I found a church that would quietly become one of the greatest turning points in my life. Through that church, I was introduced to Bible School.

Now, I should probably confess something.

I was not exactly impressed by or really enthusiastic about the school’s ability to teach me.  

Actually…I was probably a little more than a little condescending about the whole thing.

I figured, what could this small school in Sweden teach me that a lifetime with Jesus and the world’s largest Christian university hadn’t already?

Quite plainly… Everything.

Bible school wasn’t part of my plan.  Kenya certainly wasn’t part of my plan.  The older I get, the more I laugh at all the things I’ve confidently declared I would never do, because somehow they keep becoming the exact places God leads me.

Looking back now, I notice (I mean plead the 5th) that maybe…I shared a striking resemblance to Jonah.

God, however, has a remarkable habit of gently leading us toward the places we spend so much energy trying to avoid. Ironically, what first drew me toward Bible school wasn’t some overwhelming spiritual revelation.  It was a visa.  If I’m being completely honest, I wanted to stay in Sweden longer.

God took my selfish motivation and said, “I’ll raise your bet into a life that is bigger than you can even imagine.  Trust me, and I’ll give you everything you’ve ever prayed about, even the prayers you don’t remember.”

My reluctant curiosity became reluctant obedience.

Reluctant obedience eventually became a mission trip to Kenya.

A mission trip I had already decided I wasn’t going on.

I couldn’t afford to go, I wasn’t sure if I even desired to go, at the time, I was fighting through a lot in life, and this trip was simply not at the top of my to-do list. On the day I publicly declared I wasn’t going and waved my hands at the whole idea, God spoke to two people and made it abundantly clear that I needed to be there.  They chose to be obedient, and through their generosity, God used them as the vessels to get me to Africa. Their obedience changed the trajectory of my life.  That is something I will forever be thankful to them and the Lord.

My first trip to Kenya deserves an entire series of blog posts by itself.  It was full of moments I never could have planned, incredible people, and unexpected encounters with God.  While it was beautiful, life-changing, and purposeful on the way back to Sweden, I got deported upon arrival.

After being detained for 25 hours, a six-armed guard escort, and one very unique passport stamp later, I was in the U.S. again, somewhere I had zero desire to be.

I was devastated, disappointed, and confused.

Looking back, I can see redemption written all over it. God wasn’t finished writing the story.

What I thought was the end of that chapter became one of God’s greatest plot twists. Let’s just say my alarm clock and I became very close friends at 3 am, and the rest I’ll save for another Friday post.

Despite the unexpected ending, Bible school came to an end just as God intended, and I graduated with a heart that looked nothing like the one that had reluctantly walked through the doors months earlier.

Not long after, another invitation came from the Leadership Academy in Kenya.

This time, saying yes wasn't nearly as difficult. I packed my bags, boarded another plane, and arrived in Kenya in January... carrying more questions than luggage. I was elated to be in Kenya this time, but at the same time, I arrived carrying multiple questions, and I wasn’t quietly wondering about them.  It wasn’t a tearful goodbye to the U.S. I wanted to do the Leadership Academy in Kenya; I knew God had called me to be there, I just didn’t know why.  The only thing tearful about going was saying goodbye to Kraft Mac & Cheese…

I was demanding answers.

“God, what am I doing here?”  “Why did you drag me back here again?”  

Granted.. This time I wanted to be here, and I was happy, but I couldn’t get past the feeling of peace I was experiencing.  I wanted to know why.  

Then came our first four-hour prayer night.

Four hours.

FOUR.

I spent most of those four hours trying to figure out how on earth I was going to survive five months of praise and worship dance parties.  I can’t dance.  The rhythm seems to have missed me since conception.  While everyone else seemed completely at home, I was over in my little corner negotiating with God.

“Why am I here?”  “What did you bring me here for?” “What am I supposed to be doing?”  

But there was one question that outweighed all the others.

“Why do I have this overwhelming sense in my spirit that, for the first time in my life… I belong here?”

As the Leadership Academy continued, something began changing in me.

Those questions slowly stopped being questions.

The uncertainty became peace. 

The resistance became surrender.

The fear became confidence.

The more I stopped demanding answers and started listening, the more God faithfully gave them. I could never have imagined this would be where God would lead me.

When I started as a missions major at Liberty University in 2012, it wasn’t because I thought I’d become a missionary.  I simply loved the cross-cultural classes. Looking back now, even that feels like another puzzle piece.

God used my love of travel to lead me overseas.  He used a church in Sweden to bring me into Bible School.  He used Bible school to bring me to Kenya. He used Kenya to change my heart completely.  And somewhere along the way, I realized that everything I had spent years praying for was waiting for me here.

That little piece of paper sat unnoticed in a university storage bin for over a decade while God quietly connected every single dot.

The note from the screensaver.

Today, as I prepare to move back to Kenya as a full-time missionary intern serving SOS Church and SOS Bible School in Kilgoris, I’m reminded that God often works through the ordinary moments we barely notice.

A conversation. An invitation. An unexpected opportunity.  A handwritten note.  Even a screensaver.

Sometimes we only recognize God’s fingerprints when we look back. Finding that note again wasn’t just nostalgic. It was a reminder that God never wastes a moment, never forgets a prayer, and is always weaving together a story far greater than the one we could ever write ourselves.

For me, this is only the beginning.

Every Friday, I’ll be sharing another chapter of this journey, the stories behind the stories, the lessons God has taught me, the people who have shaped me, and the adventures that continue to unfold.  Then, on the first Tuesday of every month, I’ll share a more in-depth ministry update.

Who besides God could have imagined that a simple screensaver would become the first chapter of a story that would one day lead me halfway around the world?

I certainly couldn't have.

But I'm so thankful He did.

Thank you for taking the time to read the very first chapter of this journey. If God has stirred your heart and you’d like to partner with me as I prepare to serve in Kenya, I’d love to invite you to click the Partner With Me button below. There, you can learn more about praying, giving, and staying connected as we see what God writes in the chapters ahead.